Adventures with Harlan and his girlfriend, Part VI:

Harlan: Dad, did you have a paper encyclopedia?
Dad: Oh yes, before the fire we had Funk and Wagnells.
Harlan: I wouldn't trust a Funk and Wagnells. Maybe for James Brown, but that's it.

Ate Neneng today said this at least three times: "Why you so ugly. You ugly. So ugly." Thanks.

Adventures with Harlan and his girlfriend, Part V:

Harlan randomly texted me this. No context.

Me: It's a unisex bathroom.
Ate Neneng: What?
Me: Bathroom for men and women.
Ate Neneng: Oh, that no good. Gonna rape, that one.

Adventures with Harlan and his girlfriend, Part IV:

Dad: There was that kid in pre-K whom you hated because he called you "Harlan Barlan."
Harlan: That's right. That motherfucker. That's the worst. That's the worst insult.

Adventures with Harlan and his girlfriend, Part III:

Harlan's girl: So what do those two kids look like? Are they cute?
Mom: (nonchalant voice) Yes.
Harlan's girl: Awwwwww.
Mom: (nonchalant voice) They look like Nazis.

Adventures with Harlan, Part II:

(whilst on a crowded, very quiet train)
Harlan: Hey dad, could people look at porn in the library?
Dad: What?
Harlan: Can people look at porn in the library?
Dad: What? Sorry, I can't hear.
Mom: (loudly) Porn, he's asking about porn!
Dad: What?
Mom: (shouting) Porn! He wants to know about porn!

Adventures with Harlan and his girlfriend, Part I:

Harlan's girlfriend: Is that Donald Duck?

In Eastern countries, when the beaver finds that it cannot evade the dogs which are following it by its scent, it saves itself by self-mutilation. By some natural natural instinct it knows which part of its body the hunter really wants. The creature castrates itself before the hunter's eyes and throws its testicles down.... If a beaver which has already lost its testicles is hard pressed a second time by the hounds, it rushes to the top of a hillock, cocks up one of its hind-legs and shows the hunter that the organs which he is really after have already been cut off. ^*

What the FUCK is going on in "Eastern countries" that makes them want beaver testicles so badly?! I love how the author doesn't even fucking explain that. He just assumes everyone should know and follows this passage with a couple of quotations from Juvenal and St. Bernard about eunuchs, as if that's what we're really interested in reading, as opposed to what's so damned good about beaver nuts.

^* Gerald of Wales, The Journey Through Wales, trans. by Lewis Thorpe (New York: Penguin, 1978), 176.

Gynecologist: When was the last time you had a gynecological exam?
Me: Uhhhhhh... eight or nine years ago.
Gynecologist: (gives me a look reminiscent of my mother)

The Battle of Lapanto is considered one of the turning points of Europe against the encroaching Ottoman Empire. Although it didn't stop the threat — the Ottomans would besiege Vienna about a century later — it provided a boost to a disheartened populace, who had been losing territory steadily across the decades.

Supposedly.

The Reformation started in Europe with Luther nailing his 95 Theses on the door in 1517 and didn't really end until the closing of the Thirty Years' War in 1648 when people were too fucking tired of killing each other over religion. Of course the Protestant-Catholic enmity would last for a long time — there are still prejudices to this day — but kingdoms' appetite to slaughter each other over transubstantiation had quelled significantly by the end of the 1600s. Lapanto however had happened in 1571, right in the middle of this period.

If you look at Europe geographically, you can pretty much create the Protestant-Catholic divide between the north and south (Ireland being the exception). Which is understandable; it's harder for the Catholic Church to combat Protestantism the farther you leave Rome. Also harder for them to combat ecclesiastical excesses, which is why places like Norway or Scotland were open to the Reformation since they felt the majority of the corruption. Anyway, because they were in the south, Catholics bore the brunt of Ottoman aggression. If you're based in Turkey, which would you attack first: England or Italy? Italy of course. Eventually Pope Pius V couldn't take this bullshit anymore and created the Holy League, which was a bunch of Catholic maritime states like Venice or Spain, to take on the Turks. And they did. The Battle of Lapanto was a decisive victory.

But the north's reaction is interesting. Whilst the south was celebrating, the north felt ambivalent. After all, it was a Catholic victory: those heretical papists who has the Antichrist Himself as a pope. Still, the enemy were Muslims. But these Muslims don't like idolatry, which means they're not as bad as the Catholics. These mixed emotions played out in several ways. Elizabeth I of England, for example, on several occasions tried to offer support to the Ottomans to get the Catholics off her back. James VI of Scotland wrote an epic celebrating Lapanto, but had to write a disclaimer in his preface to say he doesn't support Catholicism. The idea of "Christendom" had broken down. Even back in the old days with the East-West Schism, neither side would've asked the Muslims to take the other one out. Neither would the Gnostics. This shit was new. And it showed how fucking serious the situation was: Both sides hated the other so much, they were hesitant to celebrate a victory over Muslims because it didn't involve their own group.

I think of that now when I look at the Middle East. Even though America is the Great Satan, more Muslims have died from suicide bombings and militant slaughters than Christians ever have. Yeah, all right, there are more Muslims living there and statistically are more likely to be hit, but most of the ire seems be between the Sunni and Shiite lines. Baghdad was depopulated not due to American missiles but because of Shiite gangs threatening Sunnis. And although ISIS has committed horrific crimes upon Christians and Jews living in their territory, they still claim responsibility for countless attacks on Shiites, like that twin bombing in Beirut yesterday. Like Western Christianity in the 1500s and 1600s, Islam is fracturing violently. I really hope this doesn't culminate into their version of a Thirty Years' War because no one deserves something that terrible.

[11:03:46] Dun 4 Hire: Gonna be honest, I totally forgot the plot to Brood War.
[11:03:59] Dun 4 Hire: Since like 2011 when they released Wings of Liberty, they keep on referencingshit that happened
[11:04:02] Dun 4 Hire: And I cannot remember any of it.
[11:04:04] ZsuPb: u kno what, i did too lol
[11:04:24] Dun 4 Hire: I just remember Kerrigan tricked Raynor and won in the end.
[11:04:36] ZsuPb: she tricked him?
[11:05:04] Dun 4 Hire: She pretended to return to normal because the overlord was killed at the end of the original game
[11:05:20] Dun 4 Hire: But she was still crazy.
[11:05:30] ZsuPb: WTF how do u pretend to be normal when u have like insect parts shooting out of ur body
[11:05:43] Dun 4 Hire: Listen, you're a man.
[11:05:57] Dun 4 Hire: If the woman you loved acts like she's not crazy bitch queen of blades, your penis will guide the way.
[11:06:26] ZsuPb: thats like....totally true

FUCK Legacy of the Void. I'm too fucking busy with other games right now. I can't take this shit.

I kinda wanna join a monthly flowers club, but I have no idea where to put this shit in my room.

I've been keeping a diary on and off since childhood. In recent years I've been pretty rigorous and writing daily, and can usually finish about three journals per year. If you look at my bookcase, you can see my collection lined up on one of the shelves, although most are empty and ready to be used in the coming years. Today I listened to a podcast about diaries and it brought in ideas I've never thought of before, like an audience. Many people seem to run into a mental block about this and wonder whom to address. Some name their diaries, like Michelle or Clare, and then use that in constructing sentences: "Michelle, I had a tough time today at work."

To be honest it was natural for me to just write down my stream of thought, and upon reflection I realized why. The podcast also said what made a good diary: Write the facts about what happened and then your opinions about it. If you just write the facts, you'll forget how you felt at the time. Write only your feelings, and you'll forget what you're so emotional about. I tend to do the former, and for that it doesn't really matter who the audience is: It's literally just what I did that day. Occasionally I'll throw in a line — "Yeah, and that whole process really pissed me off." — but I never delve deeply into my psyche. I suppose it boils down to why I write a diary. For some, it's a cathartic experience. For me, it's more like being a historian. Ten years from now, I'm going to be interested in what I was doing every day. I suppose if I just blandly describe my sentiments, I'd still get that historical note that the podcast described: After all, my point of view now about my past is different than what it was at the time.

Which makes it all the more regretful that I lost those diaries in the fire. The ones from my middle school and high school years in particular would've been fascinating to read since those are a very tumultuous era in anyone's life, although I get the feeling mine would just be about Harry Potter and Naruto with poorer spelling and grammar.

Yeah... this Bob Ross marathon needs to end. My productivity has taken a hit because I just spend hours watching it.

I don't know what the fuck NYPL is thinking. Their website had noticeable design problems. For example, if you wanted to request an offsite book, it took you to a completely different, older version of the site and you manually had to input information that should've been already available if you were logged in. A few weeks ago they rolled out a new webpage and I hoped that some of these issues would be resolved.

Of course, the situation was just made worse.

When you create a website, you have to consider two things: ease and aesthetics. It's better for the user to see more information in one location so they're not constantly flipping back and forth between pages, yet simultaneously you don't want it to seem cluttered or confusing. On the original page, the checkouts were highlighted different colors to give you a sense of how much time was left until the due date. That's a good choice because without even looking too deeply, I can easily sense from a glance whether I'm fucked or not.

They removed those little things that helped the user experience and added steps that previously could've been done in one. For example, on your "checked out" page, there was an option to add the book to your "completed," "for later," or "ongoing" lists. That meant not only could I do that, but I also had information on the titles I had out and their due dates. All that could be done on one page. Now if I want to move something from "for later" to "completed," I have to go to that last (requires to proceed through two pages), manually go down that list and somehow find the book, then change it. When that could've been done with ease before.

If that's not enough, they completely screwed up the app. Originally it was probably one of the slowest apps I've ever used, but it was functional. It had four tabs: one for browsing, one for searching, one to check your book statuses, and one for library locations. They completely scrapped all that and their app literally is just a link to their mobile website, and we all know how great those are.

Seriously, whom the fuck did NYPL hire because they should fire them and demand their money back. I don't know how you make something demonstrably worse. How do you screw this up? It's 2015. Surely web design schools know by now how this works and teaches its students accordingly.

According to iTunes, these are the top ten songs I've listened to:

1. Tsuna Awakens from Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
2. Imposing Visage from Tales of Destiny
3. Suoh Mikoto from K
4. A Despair-Filled Farewell from Shadow of the Colossus
5. Saber's Edge from Final Fantasy XIII
6. White Light from Tales of Zestiria by Superfly
7. Influence of Deep -CM Version- from Parasite Eve
8. Battle: VS Cocytus from Wild ARMS 2
9. Battle 2 from Final Fantasy III
10. Uragiri no Yuuyake from Durarara!! by Theatre Brook

I was... very surprised by this. I think at least two these, White Light and Uragiri no Yuuyake, are up here because I left my iPod on repeat all night, but I cannot explain Tsuna Awakens. I mean, I like the song, but not that much. And I don't remember listening to it that many times. A Despair-Filled Farewell yeah, but not that.

Battle 2 should be in the top three and the fact it's not completely disgusts me.

Could not find the OST track for Tsuna Awakens on youtube, hence the orchestra recording. Why not? Did someone finally claim copyright? For Reborn of all things?

http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-34680564

Reading this reminded me of an electrician we hired to help us set up the CAT6 ports around the house. As he and dad chatted for a bit over tea, he explained the problems with his homeland in the West Indies. During his grandparents' generation they fiercely wanted independence and won it, but he thought at a steep cost because the island as a whole became impoverished. Although they now could control their own destiny, they lost the support from a larger, stronger nation. He compared his home to something like Martinique, which remained with its European overlord: They use the euro, they can send their children to Paris for education, and if there's trouble the French central government has the resources to help.

Unfortunately small, island nations rarely have enough natural resources to support themselves. There rarely is enough land for great swaths of agriculture and it intrinsically does not have enough space to support a large enough population to compete in the modern world. Usually they turn to one industry, which is not ideal: Much of the West Indies is dependent on tourism, which of course could shift the moment a hurricane hits. Or Cyprus which dabbled in banking and its entire economy tanked during the 2008 crisis.

What happened to Hawaii was pretty fucked up, but simultaneously I think they should heed what that electrician said: What is Hawaii gonna do if the US government pulls out?

China's ending its one-child policy for a two-child because of demographic issues. People predicted this decades ago: If China continued that path, the trajectory would end with a substantial elderly population overburdening the younger generation. Their factories would be denuded as people retired and no one would be available to refill positions.

Malthus' An Essay on the Principle of Population was filled with made-up numbers and facts, but I think some of his points apply. There were "preventative checks," i.e. abstinence, birth control, abortion, etc. And if the population got too large, we had "positive checks" that lowered it like famine, war, or disease.

Malthus wrote his work just as the Agricultural Revolution began, so many of the positive checks never came into place: Less and less people were one bad winter away from starvation, and more moved into the middle class. Throughout the 1800s we learned about germs and clean water, and then in the early 1900s we discovered antibiotics and used vaccines more efficiently. Population really skyrocketed.

But I can't help but feel it's not sustainable. It's literally impossible for humanity to expand exponentially, so at some point we'll have to stop. And then what? What would the checks be? Apparently the preventative ones are only good at keeping the population steady because otherwise you'd enter the situation that China has entered. So then we'd have to bring in the positive ones? Another Spanish Flu? Another World War? That shit sounds terrifying.