I went to the ophthamologist today and had a test for my periphery vision, in which I had to press a button whenever I saw a flashing light. The tool was long and slender, and clearly was meant to be gripped in the hand like you're holding a penis, and then the thumb would click the button on the top. I however could not be normal:

Technician: Why are you holding the instrument sideways in both of your hands?
Me: Oh, it feels like a game controller like this.
Technician: ...
Me: ...